Archive for August, 2010

Is this like your relationship?

Sunday, August 8th, 2010

Women are NOT cars that break down and
need to be fixed. Women are more like flowers that
need to be showered with understanding and love.

What it means: Men and women do not approach
emotional upsets the same way.

Men go to a space by themselves and then figure out
a ’solution’.

While…

Women prefer to have someone listen, validate their feeling with
words AND emotions.

Example:

Tom forgets to grab the bread that Michelle asks
him to pick up on his way home.

Michelle has had a bad day, and barks at Tom
when he shows up without the bread.

Tom, thinking like a man, says he’ll go get the
bread after dinner and thinks that’ll be the end of Michelle’s
anger. (the FIX)

But…

During dinner he can still feel Michelle’s anger.

Tom returns the anger with anger and the
whole ‘bread situation’ explodes into WWIII

Now imagine…

If when Tom returned home…(he would’ve looked
deeper and realized this was about more than just
the bread)

Michelle: Where’s the bread?

Tom: Oh CRAP! I totally spaced it out!

Michelle: It figures. (angrily)

Tom: (Taking Michelle in his arms) I can’t
believe I forgot the bread. I’ve been so
forgetful lately.

Michelle: (cooling down) It’s okay. It’s
not a big deal.

Tom: No, it is a big deal. (cupping Michelle’s
face in his hands) I love you, you’re just
as busy as I am and I shouldn’t
forget such a small request.

Michelle: (big smile) Ooooh…I’ve just
had a bad day and felt totally unappreciated. I
shouldn’t be such a grump. You’re so sweet.

Tom: It’s okay…I was a bad boy…You
can punish me later after I get the bread.
What happened today?

Michelle: Mmmmm…(and she tells him
about her day.)

Now, I used ‘bread’ as a small example.

What’s important to understand is that you don’t
HAVE to solve every problem.

If your break up was over ‘money’…more than
likely…it wasn’t REALLY over ‘money’.

Anymore than the argument between Tom and
Michelle was about the bread.

More great advice on solving relationship problems

Is It Really Possible to Make a Long-distance Relationship Work?

Wednesday, August 4th, 2010

You’ve finally met the person you’ve been dreaming about. Everything is absolutely perfect until one of you has to go to another city due to the job requirements. Now, you are faced with a big problem. Ought to you commence a long-distance relationship? Will your long-distance relationship work? Everyone has heard the long-distance horror stories. Here are several questions to help you to figure out if a long-distance relationship will meet your needs.

1. Do you trust this individual absolutely?

If you answered ‘no’ to this question, you might as well close this window and begin checking out online dating sites. Trust is vital in a relationship, but it really becomes an utter necessity when you’re attempting to make a long-distance relationship work. Is it possible to keep your cool whenever a good-looking man or lady posts on your loved one’s Facebook wall? Are you comfortable with the fact that he/she may having a good time at the bars without you once in awhile? If these things are going to upset you (and they certainly drive people crazy), then save yourself the effort and find your self an on-site lover. However, if you can look at your relationship and honestly say that you will trust this person to remain loyal in any circumstance and honor your relationship at all times, that’s a great sign that you can make a long-distance relationship work.

2. Do you see yourself with this person long-term?

Honestly, long-distance relationships are difficult: really, really, hard. If you aren’t seeing a long-term future for the two of you, it may be worth cutting your losses and getting out now. Do you really want to invest this time and hardship in a relationship that you don’t see going anywhere? However, if you adore somebody and you are committed to building a long term relationship with that individual, then the challenges are worthwhile. What you are missing in movie dates and cuddling on the couch now will probably be repaid to you in an incredible long term relationship with the individual you love. Commit yourself and make your long-distance relationship work.

3. Do you have a plan?

How often will you see one another? When are you planning to live in the same place? A long distance relationship with nothing to look forward to can be draining. If you are able to set your relationship up so your visits are milestones that lead up to an eventual future together, you will always have something to anticipate and be excited about. You’ll also know that you’re always moving closer to your end goal of being together. You are able to turn a frustrating situation into an exciting journey as a couple. If you can’t set up a plan or agree on a time that you will be together, it will probably be much more difficult to make your long-distance relationship work. So, sit down with your long-term goals in your mind and a calendar in your hands and start planning.

If you answered ‘yes’ to all three questions, then go for it! You and your lover have what it takes to make a long-distance relationship work. When times are challenging, just focus back on these three big questions. If you remember that you adore this individual, want to be with him/her long-term, and have a strategy for your future, then all of the challenges ought to start to seem a little bit smaller. Maintain a positive attitude and make that long-distance relationship work!

For more advice on making your long-distance relationship work, please visit Relationship Help!

What Is It That Men Must Have In A Relationship

Monday, August 2nd, 2010

It may be an age long question, but it is still one that is mystifying to us. Do they want us to do all the chasing or playing hard to get – or is that uninterested?  Perhaps there are no hard and fast rules, but a few hints that wouldn’t go a miss. If you are in this for keeps what  facts should you know?

Click Here For A Comprehensive Guide On What Women Men Adore

•    HE WANTS YOU TO BE ON HIS LEVEL: Sounds sort of straight forward when you think about it, but not all men have the same type of friendships as women do. A lot of men don’t have anyone they can talk to about stuff, allow him to talk to you and it will improve your relationship.

•    HE WANTS SOMEONE WHO REMAINS CALM WHEN HE’S UPSET: Opposite personality types can work together well, if he is a hot head, try and calm down the situation, not turn on the heat. If you can keep your composure when he is freaking out, then it will be to your credit. This doesn’t mean taking all sorts of rubbish, just not rising to the bait and screaming as well.

•    HE WANTS TO BE HIMSELF: Starting off a relationship with a massive check list of “to do” points about your partner’s personality is a big no no. You have to take the rough with the smooth when it comes to being with someone. If you are really not going to adapt to life with the guy, warts and all, it is time to ask what you really want.

•    Click Here For The Review Of The Woman Men Adore and Never Want To Leave

•    HE WANTS YOU TO BE YOURSELF TOO!: You don’t want to let someone else’s thoughts and preferences override yours. If a boyfriend wants to control your every move it is time to watch out.. Mostly, a man wants you to be the person he chose when he met you. If you wish to pursue a career, extend your education etc then do it -he will respect you more for it.

•    HE DOESN’T WANT TO BE TAKEN FOR GRANTED: Nobody wants to be seen as part of the furniture. Make time doing things you know he will like too. Be spontaneous!

•    HE DOESN’T WANT TO FIGHT YOU: Small differences aside, being a couple is really about being there for each other, and that means doing everything you can to help him when it is needed most.

•    HE WANTS YOU TO TRUST HIM: He needs you to trust him, whether it is on a business trip or on a boys night with friends. Remember, you can’t keep him locked up and all to yourself.

If you want to know more about what men really want just click on the following link Men….What Do They Really Want!